I havent been sleeping until 3, I have little time to eat and I lost 5 pounds just in the past two weeks.

I miss my tumblr babies <3

D:

I’m in such a fragile emotional state right now. School has began, I’m taking two APS, and landed myself the hardest teachers in those APS. I’m also taking spanish level 2, precalc/trig, US history, choir, and track. I have an early AM class that starts at 7:00 while regular 1st period classes begin at 8:16.

I also work on the weekends from 11-6, Saturday and Sunday.

My boyfriend and I are staying strong despite everything. We’ve fought a lot recently and we’re both really stressed and overwhelmed but we’re still staying strong. I’ve been feeling really attached to him recently, and I hate it because he isnt as attached to me as I am to him. I’ve discovered it doesn’t mean he doesn’t love me, he’s just scared of being dependent on me, especially since we’re so young. We do love each other a lot, and he is my soul mate, regardless of our relationship status, friends, lovers, fwb…whatever. I still love him and want to be around him. We’ve been discussing the end of our relationship and how we both want to stay friends if not best friends. After all he is leaving for college at the end of this year (he’s a school year above me). Well we’ll see how that goes.

As far as friends are concerned, there is this girl who really is driving me up a wall. She and I used to be close and now she pretends to be nonchalant and polite around me after she absolutely ditched/backstabbed me. She is actually the fakest girl I have ever met and I hate that phrase. I understand we do what we can to fit in, but what she does really just is awful. She uses people for attention, she uses people for their popularity and tries to feed off of it. She tries to one up everyone and is so irritating. I was so sweet to her and I really valued her friendship, but excuse me I give about 3 chances where I will try and try. But I’m not a masochist. I’m gonna stop, and you can grovel all you want, but I refuse to be your friend.

Sigh. Sorry for the rant, its been a long week.

As far as my physical progress is concerned…

Today was my first day of training with track. I’m the manager and I get to train all I want with them to stay in shape. I won’t have to run meets (though I kinda want to) and I don’t have the pressure to complete the workout perfectly. It’s the best deal ever.

I’ll post progress pics in a couples weeks. Last time I was on sprints my legs were absolutely amazing, I’m hoping my JIGGLES become tiny sways.

Our workout?

1 mile in 10 minutes, drills, abs today, and greeks (huge stairs)
I better lose my fat! I’m trying really hard to make sure I’m eating enough and losing weight, I really want the fat gone.

Fuck fat.

Anyway, how are you lovelies? I hope you guys are doing well. None of you talk to me :(

It’s okay I love you guys xoxo

N